


Leap of Faith

by rosecake



Category: The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:21:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28144533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosecake/pseuds/rosecake
Summary: Dr. Gaul knows they cheated, and she doesn't care.  And so, in the aftermath of the Hunger Games, Coriolanus convinces them to let her stay in the Capitol.
Relationships: Lucy Gray Baird/Coriolanus Snow
Comments: 3
Kudos: 26
Collections: Yuletide 2020





	Leap of Faith

**Author's Note:**

  * For [flipflop_diva](https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/gifts).



The Capitol promised the victor of the Hunger Games one thing, and one thing only: you got to live. There were a few things Lucy Gray might have expected to come along with her victory, minor things like a shower and a hot meal before they send her home, maybe, but she had to admit they hadn’t been promised to her. 

Now that the Peacekeepers had her on the ground she wasn’t sure she was even going to make it out of the city alive. 

“Stop struggling,” said one of them men holding her, and when she kicked out at him he struck her right in the eye. 

Lucy Gray went still after that. The arena was one thing, but if a dozen heavily armed men wanted to smash her skull in there really wasn’t much she could do about it. Maybe that was how it ended for everyone who survived the Games. It wasn't like she'd ever met another victor, or even heard about one after their games were over and done with.She wouldn’t put it past the Capitol to save a handful of coins by tossing the winner’s body into whatever hole they’d dug up for the losers instead of springing for a train ticket back to the districts. 

The Peacekeepers weren't gentle as they searched her, tearing into her mother’s already ragged dress and leaving marks on her skin. She was tired and beaten down enough that it barely even bothered her. Not until she heard the sharp <I>clink</I> of metal on concrete. 

“Found something,” said one of the Peacekeepers. He picked up the compact Coriolanus had given her, raising it up to the light. 

Every time she thought she’d hit rock bottom life just had to go and prove her wrong. She’d thought about ditching the compact once she’d used up the poison. She should have ditched it, really, but she hadn't been able to bear the thought of tossing something so precious to Coriolanus. Not after all he’d done for her. 

He’d been kind to her, had cared for her, and the Capitol wasn’t a place that tolerated that kind of humanity. She could only hope they wouldn't make him pay too dearly for it. 

\----

They interrogated her for what felt like hours. Lucy Gray had always had a quick mind, and she was pretty sure she’d managed to keep her story straight, but she was exhausted and hungry and maybe a little bit in shock so she couldn't be exactly sure. When they left her alone she put her head down on the table and drifted off, her exhaustion winning out over her anxiety. 

She came to as Peacekeepers pulled her out of her chair. They dragged her down a halllway, disoriented and unsure of how long she’d been out. 

They opened a door, and she took in a deep breath as she saw Coriolanus look up at her, his face pale and drawn. He looked a little better than she felt but that wasn't saying much. 

The Peackeepers roughly pushed her onto the bench next to Coriolanus. Unsure of what else to do, she slid closer to Coriolanus. He might not be able to keep her safe, but so far he was the one person in the world who might be willing to try. 

He covered her hand with his, squeezing tightly. As tense as he was, he at least didn’t seem blame her for their predicament. 

“Do you know what’s happening?” she whispered, hoping the Peacekeepers couldn’t hear them, and he shook his head. 

“No.No idea,” he whispered back. Then he tried to smile, but it looked forced. Practically ghoulish.“Congratulations on winning.” 

She laughed, louder than she’d meant to with the Peacekeeper still watching them. She might’ve been a little hysterical. “I don’t feel much like a winner.” 

Before he could answer, the door opened and a woman Lucy Gray didn’t recognize stepped in.

By the way she carried herself, and the way everyone else reacted to her, Lucy Gray guessed she must be in charge. “What’s going on?” asked Coriolanus, standing. His hands were trembling slightly, and he was clearly afraid, but he managed to keep his voice steady. “Is this the way the games normally end?Lucy Gray looks worse now than she did in the arena." 

The woman looked over at Lucy Gray and shrugged. The total lack of sympathy wasn’t surprising, but it made Lucy Gray’s blood boil all the same. “Highbottom had some questions about your tribute’s win,” she said, looking Lucy Gray.

Lucy Gray didn't much like being subject to her stare. 

“There’s nothing—“ Coriolanus started, working himself up, but the woman cut him off.

“I, however, couldn’t care less. She’s the last one alive so she's the victor. I'm not terribly interested in how she managed it. Congratulations on the win, Coriolanus,” she said, and then waved a hand in Lucy Gray’s direction.“The peacekeepers will take her back where she came from. I-" 

"Wait, said Coriolanus, and Lucy Gray could see in the woman's expression that interrupting her had been a mistake. “Let her stay in the Capitol.”

She looked at him, too surprised to say anything. Not that she thought anyone was interested in her opinion. She hated the Capitol. Absolutely loathed it and everything it stood for. But she had problems waiting for her back in District 12, too. They'd tried to kill her once, who knew if they'd try again? 

That, and Coriolanus was here. Not in District 12. 

The woman’s eyes narrowed. "Why?" she said, and Lucy Gray swallowed. She didn't look pleased. But in a second her expression changed. She smiled, about as warm and friendly as an alligator. “ You know what, never mind. She can stay.But she’s your responsibility.”

She looked over at Lucy Gray, her dark eyes glittering, almost like she was daring her to do something. "If anything happens it'll be both your heads." 

\----

“Dr. Gaul could have at least called us a car,” grumbled Coriolanus as they walked through the dark, winding streets of the Capitol.

Lucy Gray was cold in the thin gray shift the Peacekeepers had given her after searching her. She clung to Coriolanus, partly for warmth, partly for support. And partly just because she wanted to feel him. 

“She didn't seem the warm and generous type." Really, Lucy Gray would be happy never seeing her again. 

He sighed. "True. But you deserve better. You can stay with my family for now, but we'll have to figure something else out, since we'll be losing the apartment in a few weeks," he said, bitterness coloring his voice. 

“I’m sorry."

She hadn’t known that. She wished she could offer him some help, but what could she do? Right now she wasn't much more than a burden. She stumbled over nothing, just her feet refusing to work properly, but Coriolanus caught her. 

“Do you want to sit down for a minute?” he asked, and she nodded. 

She leaned against the brick wall and let herself slid down to the ground. It was filthy, but she was already about as dirty as she could possibly be. Coriolanus sat down next to her, wrapping his arms around her as she rested her head on his shoulder. He must be exhausted too, after days spent arguing before Dr. Gaul let them go, but he still felt faintly of roses. It was the nicest thing she'd experienced since the games started, just the familiar and reassuring scent of him. 

"I know I've caused a lot of problems for you," she said. "I'm sure I'm still causing problems. But I want you to know I'm grateful." 

He sighed, and she felt him press his face against her hair. God, she wished she weren't such a mess, dirty and tired and one eye half swollen shut. 

“We’ll figure it out,” he said.“After a good night’s sleep we can figure it out.” 

She nodded, staring at the trash littering the alleyway. If she closed her eyes for too long she was liable to fall asleep in the street. "Sleep sounds wonderful. I barely feel human right now." 

He clutched her close, then, his hands twisting in her shift. "I'm just glad you're alive," he said. "That's the important thing." 

"Just barely," she said, and suddenly tears sprang into her eyes. She'd thought she was too tired to cry, too dehydrated, but she wasn't after all. She'd come so close to dying. And why? Because of some war she barely remembered? Because some brat got jealous? She could still see Jessup's face, twisted up in rabid madness, could still feel those snakes crawling across her body, could feel the cold panic of not knowing if they'd bit or not. She'd never forget it. Never forget what it felt like to watch Covey drink that poison she'd left her. 

"You're okay now," said Coriolanus, stroking her back as she sobbed. "You're safe." 

There wasn't any safety to be found in the world, though. Certainly not in the Capitol. She'd seen the malice in Dr. Gaul's eyes, she'd seen the blood lust in the spectators. The people who'd bought her food and water and kept her alive. 

Coriolanus put his palm on her cheek, pulling her face towards him. “I promise, Lucy Gray.” 

He stroked her hair back from her forehead. She must look awful, an absolute mess, even worse than after that train ride into hell. Still, he was looking at her with adoration in his eyes.“Coriolanus,” she started, unsure of what it was she wanted to say, what she was feeling. Coriolanus kissed her, then, his mouth pressed up against her chapped lips. His hand was in her hair, and the other around her waist, pulling her as close as possible. And what more could she ask for than to be wanted, even in her lowest moment? Even though she knew it was illusionary being held still made her feel safe, feel calmed.

“This is the first time we’ve been alone, isn’t it? I've wanted to be alone with you since the first day we met. 

“Me too,” she said. At first it had been an idle thought - she'd been charmed that he'd bothered to show up, but she hadn't really expected much more from him. But every meeting she'd started to believe in him a little more. And now her she was, alive because of him. A real miracle. Anyone else and she wouldn't have stood a chance. 

She pushed her face against Coriolanus's shoulder, wiping away her tears with his shirt. She wished she was in better shape. She wished she was kissing him in a field somewhere, bright and sunny. Or wrapped tight in the same blanket while it snowed outside. Someplace real and free and beautiful, not sitting on the hard ground of some filthy Capitol alleyway. 

“We could leave,” she said, quietly. Even in the deserted alley she was afraid to say it too loudly. “Go North.” 

Coriolanus went very still. “You can't," he said. "You heard Dr. Gaul." 

“Together,” she said, looking up at him. His face had gone blank, and she wished she'd just left it alone. She wouldn't leave him like that, not after everything he'd done for her. "Both of us. I don't know that I could even manage it on my own. I wouldn't even want to. I want us to be together." 

He was silent for a very long time, looking past her.“I have family,” he said, standing up. 

Of course. He had a family, a home. A home that was still quite a ways away. He held out his hand and helped her up. "I understand," she said. 

"And the important thing is that we're together, right? We can be together here," he said. He held onto her hand tightly as they walked. 

"Yes," she said. "It's just - this place, it's dangerous." 

"We'll be okay," he said. "Between the two of us we'll figure out a way to make it." 

Lucy Gray swallowed her doubts and nodded. He’d done right by her so far, after all. Better than anyone else in her life had. 

"Alright," she said. She smiled, trying to get herself to really believe it. "Go on and lead me home." 

She might hate this city, it's people, it's casual cruelty, but she didn't hate him. She loved him. And she had faith in him. They could make it work if he said they could. And if not, and they had to run in the night? She was fine with that, just so long as Coriolanus ran with her. 

Not that long ago she'd told herself she'd never trust again. But as they walked down the streets, hand in hand, she let herself believe that he'd run with her. 


End file.
